Mons Veneris

Of your existence I wasn't aware,
Until I noticed the other girls and began to compare,
I spent my teenage years wishing you there,
My funny pubic hair.

At my smooth hairless skin I used to glare,
You drove me down to the depths of despair,
I don't even seem to have developed elsewhere,
My silly pubic hair.

What if I never blossom down there?
Doesn't that just seem a little unfair?
That I cannot contain you in my underwear,
My elusive pubic hair.

But I needn't have given myself such a scare,
I looked down one day and you'd answered my prayer,
Now even I had my fair share
Of curly pubic hair.

I thought that I'd want a royal fanfare,
But to be perfectly honest I wouldn't dare,
Coz it turned out I didn't like you, I wasn't prepared
For this unruly pubic hair.

Collection of pheromones? I'll collect mine elsewhere,
Sexual maturity? I've got boobs now, so there!
There surely must be a way to repair
This faulty pubic hair.

So I found a solution that I felt was fair,
To give my mons veneris a flair,
I pay a nice lady to wax you bare,
My redundant pubic hair.